As always my younger, bigger Brohan makes me think, so this will just be a short one (ahem) to air my thoughts on his thoughts regarding my philosophical ruminations of the previous post. His leaving such thoughts on my Myspace page disturbs my sense of continuity, and although my sense of continuity is narrow and tyrranical I will give him shit anyway. (Insert image of my giving the stink-eye here. I have tried to take the picture, it doesn't work.)
My brother Adam is indeed one who has emerged from a spiritual crisis into a spiritual maturity, I certainly wouldn't presume to speak for him, but so it seems to me from my very often exceedingly distant geographical location. Moreover he is embarking on a promising career (at Stony Brook, which just for bragging rights didn't give me the time of day) that will impell him to say as much, and to use his experience to help others. Watching him work through this latest stage of his young life was heart-rending, even as I never really had any doubts that he would come through. My brother is made of stern stuff, and over-educated as I am, he's always been the smart one.
So I suppose I misspoke when I criticized Constantius' description. I certainly believe that one can come out the other side, even though many don't, and may their souls rest easy. I think the analogy to puberty is very apt, because I am changed by a spiritual crisis, even if it is precipitated by what others would perceive as a detail. I suppose my point of difference is that I don't believe the cracking of the voice ever goes away, I hear it in my brother's voice sometimes and I see that secret smile in the faces of other people I know who have survived something that makes the everyday noise of everyday life seem quieter, beautiful and amusing. But I shouldn't say that these are the only signs of a deeper understanding, I don't know that much. I only think I know that the signs Constantius describes do not pass like the symptoms of puberty, they remain and in my experience renew themselves.
As a further windy word, when I say that I can't count on any benefit from such crises, it is only because I have been warned against taking them for granted. They are not tools to be used, or rungs to be climbed, and once they break over you there's no paradigm or template to cling to, everyone finds their own way and for their own reasons. I suppose that's why they always make the best stories, because if they are described well they are both utterly new and deeply familiar. Maybe that's what Constantius means to indicate with "repetition"? I would of course love to think so...
Have I pressed "The Dream of the Ridiculous Man" on anyone lately? If not, I meant to. Let that be the picture of this post in fact. This is the best/cheapest edition by the best translators, The Dream is the last story. Or you could ask Andrew Chute to recite the first few paragraphs.
My brother Adam is indeed one who has emerged from a spiritual crisis into a spiritual maturity, I certainly wouldn't presume to speak for him, but so it seems to me from my very often exceedingly distant geographical location. Moreover he is embarking on a promising career (at Stony Brook, which just for bragging rights didn't give me the time of day) that will impell him to say as much, and to use his experience to help others. Watching him work through this latest stage of his young life was heart-rending, even as I never really had any doubts that he would come through. My brother is made of stern stuff, and over-educated as I am, he's always been the smart one.
So I suppose I misspoke when I criticized Constantius' description. I certainly believe that one can come out the other side, even though many don't, and may their souls rest easy. I think the analogy to puberty is very apt, because I am changed by a spiritual crisis, even if it is precipitated by what others would perceive as a detail. I suppose my point of difference is that I don't believe the cracking of the voice ever goes away, I hear it in my brother's voice sometimes and I see that secret smile in the faces of other people I know who have survived something that makes the everyday noise of everyday life seem quieter, beautiful and amusing. But I shouldn't say that these are the only signs of a deeper understanding, I don't know that much. I only think I know that the signs Constantius describes do not pass like the symptoms of puberty, they remain and in my experience renew themselves.
As a further windy word, when I say that I can't count on any benefit from such crises, it is only because I have been warned against taking them for granted. They are not tools to be used, or rungs to be climbed, and once they break over you there's no paradigm or template to cling to, everyone finds their own way and for their own reasons. I suppose that's why they always make the best stories, because if they are described well they are both utterly new and deeply familiar. Maybe that's what Constantius means to indicate with "repetition"? I would of course love to think so...
Have I pressed "The Dream of the Ridiculous Man" on anyone lately? If not, I meant to. Let that be the picture of this post in fact. This is the best/cheapest edition by the best translators, The Dream is the last story. Or you could ask Andrew Chute to recite the first few paragraphs.
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